Strategies To Follow When Dealing With Stress

It has been claimed that modern civilization has merely moved pain and discomfort from the physical world to the emotional.  Hello stress!

Again, many strategies used to control anxiety and depression are useful when dancing with the modern nemesis called stress.  One is music.  Immerse yourself in its magic as a means to escape from negative emotions, and therefore exercise some control over them.

Share your aspirations and concerns, and never, never forget that the most effective healing remedy in the world is to help another person.  Almost without exception we will be offered our own Lazarus.  Many fellow travellers will die emotionally of anxiety, depression and stress years before they physically take their leave.  On the back of my professional card I have two little quotations:  “All you have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to you”- J.R.R. Tolkien  and  “You have not lived the perfect day unless you have done something for someone who will never be able to repay you” – anon

   Self-EMDR-relax It must be acknowledged that most people prefer a more pragmatic approach to the exhaustive, corrosive, overwhelming discomfort we call stress.  Try the following:  A quiet,  meditative stroll.  Feel your footfalls.  Calm your breathing.  Look at the trees or gardens.  Make a point of reminding yourself of how lucky you are, compared with many others.  Meditation is a medically proven way of lowering blood pressure, breaking negative endocrinal cycles, and creating positive expectation which plays itself out.  There are many different methods and techniques, and therefore many options available.

Perhaps the most popular stress-busting method in certain warm parts of the world is the early afternoon nap, although it shows no sign of spreading – beyond the much favoured “nana nap”. But the ultimate remedy for me has always been traveling, I remember last year when I felt like I needed to get away from everything that was causing me stress, I remember one day I got up and decided to contact the
best outer banks rentals out there, went I got back from my little vacation I felt better than ever.

A psychotherapeutic approach used for many years is progressive relaxation, in which groups of muscles are tightened and then abruptly relaxed.  Inescapably the muscular relaxation flows on as mental-emotional relaxation.  Of course stress and relaxation cannot exist side by side.

Reframing a stressful situation so it sits more comfortably with the person involved is a further possibility.  In other words, if Mary’s diagnosis with cancer coincides with her compelling need to demonstrate her trust, her spiritual faith, and her courage to the children as an inspiration, she might welcome the diagnosis as a God-given opportunity.  Stress is reduced.  Mary feels she has been touched, not by chance, by the hand of God.  Her prayers have been answered.

Finally, a long-term solution is offered for an entire spectrum of stressors and their resolution.  CLICK HERE to check out the self-help guide, Self-EMDR, by Desmond Long.

Don’t Let Depression Take Over Your Life

Depression is a terrifying, complex phenomenon that affects most people in every community at some time in their life.  In simplistic terms we encounter various types of depression.  (a) Chronic depression typically comes and goes, often varying in intensity, sometimes for a lifetime.  (b) Reactive depression may appear for a particular and recognisable reason.  For example, a grief situation typically causes depression, accompanied by a spectrum of other negative emotions such as anger, denial (in the case of illness or death), exhaustion, anxiety, and reduced self-esteem and self-confidence, which needed to be treated intermediately, you have to find ways of distracting yourself, anything is better than just thinking about your problems even going online to get royalty free images, who knows, it is worth noting that grief is caused by any loss situation – not only a death.  (c)  Clinical depression.   This is the term generally denoting an episode so severe it debilitates the victim.

Not surprisingly depression accompanies many other illnesses, simply because the loss of one’s health must be grieved like any other loss, if healing is to take place.  Pain, hopelessness, fear, the need to recreate oneself, and even suicidality, cause a compounding misery. I recommend you to check out Lumitea Bloating relief for any digestive problems you might have.
Measures used to combat anxiety disorder are often effective with depression.  For example, traumas of the past which have caused “bad” emotional symptoms, are likely to be triggered or resurrected if present-day circumstances are similar.  Take the case of John, a chubby kid who was never able to understand maths or English.  Poor John was bullied by both the sporty kids and the clever kids.  In his first job, stacking shelves at the supermarket, he was mercilessly bullied and ridiculed by an assistant manager.  The emotions of the youngster came flooding back, especially the depression, the shyness and the conviction he was inferior.  The felt like hiding in the wardrobe.  He hated himself.  He was too embarrassed to allow anyone to see the tears.  He’d be better off dead!

The young man had reverted to a child again.  The victimised kid’s emotions had replaced those of the adult, because the assistant manager “felt” so much like the bullies at school.

What can John do about it?  In any number of ways he can introduce techniques into his life that he knew nothing about as a youngster.  That is, John can gather to himself methods of giving himself empowerment, a sense of structure and being in control.  In the process John becomes less and less like the schoolboy.  (I would endeavour to empower my client, move him in the direction of independence, and certainly not tell him what to do.) You can´t let depression take over your life, I always recommend taking some time off to better yourself, maybe going to the beach and checking out a cooler resource to get a cooler, fill it up with food and just go and relax, let the depression disapear.

Self-EMDRbeingaloneAs well, I would discuss the advantages of his using positive affirmations before sleep every night, such as “I now own my life.  Respectfully I defer to no-one, although I will always listen and learn.  Bullies, of whatever age, feel so inferior they need to put on a show of how big and strong and clever they are.  It’s just an act.  In fact they are pathetic idiots.  I feel sorry for them.”

Other techniques?  Assertiveness training is an incredibly powerful approach.  Enquire about neighbourhood classes, or obtain a pamphlet or DVD on the subject.

It is not helpful to overload oneself.  Do one chore or project at a time, and take satisfaction from doing it well.  Also make time for rest and recreation (re-creation).

With depression the inclination frequently exists to isolate yourself from other people.  This is the worst thing you can do.  Seek out a friendly listener.  Confide.  Even ask for help, never an easy task for the male of the species.  Seek out the courage.  You will surprise yourself.  A primal need exists to express the pain existing within, for that process encourages healing.  Another method is to write, write, write out the problem.  Start a diary.  Write to yourself or an imaginary friend.  Tell it like it is.  Then either keep it or discard it.

Yes, words are only words, and depression is an emotion and not words.  The most effective method of combining the two can be found in a modality that is exploding in popularity among mental healthcare professionals in over 130 countries – called EMDR.  A very recent development to this technique is Self-EMDR, whose reach and protocols were researched and developed by Desmond Long and his team.  Check it out.  CLICK HERE.

What Is Anxiety Disorder?

What is anxiety?  It is a normal, healthy and necessary part of our day-to-day life.  For example, we should be anxious and therefore vigilant to an appropriate degree when standing on the edge of a cliff in a blustery wind;  unless we’re a bird, of course.  Again, anxiety is an entirely understandable response for Mary as she awaits the results of her cancer biopsy.

But anxiety disorder is different.  By definition it is typically marked by vulnerable emotions, a feeling of dread, extreme nervousness or the impression of being unsafe – when there is no objective reason for these reactions.  Debilitating panic attacks are an extreme example of anxiety disorder. sad_eyes_Woman_EMDR_therapy

Mental healthcare specialists have claimed that, worldwide, 30 percent of the  population suffer from emotional problems every year, sufficiently severe to require professional intervention.  Whether or not such a blanket claim is meaningful and provable, it must be acknowledged that anxiety, depression, anger management problems, an inappropriate response to stress, and a general dissatisfaction with life, afflict virtually all Western countries.  Perhaps strangely, some statistics claim that the poorer the community the happier are its members!

So… what causes anxiety disorder?  Simplifying the old “nature versus nurture” approach, the question of genetics must be looked at.  If an unusually high incidence of anxiety runs in the family, its members downstream tend to have a higher incidence of anxiety.  A predisposition is said to exist in the bloodline.  But if Granddad were a manic depressive (bipolar), perhaps a bully who screamed and ranted at his children, they are likely to grow up in a fraught environment – unsafe, unloving, intimidating.  In turn this learnt behaviour can be passed from generation to generation.  Children are very, very sensitive and impressionable, and not only model the responses of the authority figures in their own life, but also develop sometimes unfortunate coping mechanisms;  such as anxiety disorder.  In an extreme case, “If he scares me too much I’ll get a migraine or asthma, then he won’t be allowed to hurt me.”  Of course the migraine or asthma is purely a subconscious psychosomatic reaction.

There are various strategies used to combat anxiety disorder.  In terms of this book, Self-EMDR:  The Complete Therapeutic Approach, we tell people that instead of taking a pill so it doesn’t hurt so much, why not remove what is causing the pain.  This approach also makes a reader independent and self-contained, all for the price of several cups of coffee.

(1)  Needless to say, both Complementary/Alternative and Allopathic (orthodox) medication is available to treat anxiety disorder.

(2)  Some sufferers are able to move the emotional stress to the physical level by resorting to a programme of physical exercise.  It is much easier to drain physical stress than emotional stress, simply by resting up for a while.

(3)  Talking to a friend or family member enables you to express the conflict causing anxiety disorder within a supportive environment, and often in the process create more of a sense of balance, control and structure.  This is what counselling is all about.  Seldom is a person destroyed by a trauma.  Rather, it is the lack of support which does the damage.

(4)  Mindfulness exercises.  A meditating technique involves the individual focussing acutely on that point in time called “the present” to the exclusion of the past and the future.  Significantly, stress and anxiety flow when one remembers past conflicts and pain;  and also when one looks into the future, anticipating further conflicts and pain.  The present is a fraction of a second which we  travel – locked in – that is free from both.

(5)  Set goals for yourself daily, and keep to them.  This establishes the impression of structure and control, the very qualities missing when anxiety disorder is encountered.

(6)  Practise deep breathing.  While anxiety can cause the victim to  hyperventilate, measured diaphragm breathing can actually “fool” the autonomic nervous system into emerging from its “fight or flight” response – that is part of anxiety disorder.

(7)  Diet.  Informed nutritional advice, available from a dietician or the pharmacy, has been credited with reducing or eliminating anxiety disorder.  In fact a healthy diet is essential for many areas of well being.  Complementary/alternative practitioners with access to dietary supplements may also prove helpful.

(8)  Check out the book by Desmond Long : Self-EMDR:  The Complete Therapeutic ApproachCLICK HERE.

Self-EMDR – Is It Safe?

Self EMDR The Breakthrough New TherapyIs it safe?

Just how safe?

Although EMDR (sometimes called “processing”) has captured, in fact revolutionized, psychological practice in over 90 countries during a mere 15 years, its birth can be traced back to the dawn of modern civilization.  Indigenous American Indians stamping their feet as they dance around a campfire are entrancing themselves, inspiring themselves, with the same process.

Grandma gently moving backwards and forwards in her rocking chair is in a similar neurological trance.  As with little Mary on the swing in her backyard, and her baby brother who is being rocked to and fro in Mother’s arms or in the cradle.

But therapeutic self-EMDR, is that just as safe?  Yes.  As safe as Grandma and Mary.  In all cases their brain is gently being pulsed by the physical movements.  The resulting trance makes them delightfully relaxed and comfortable – and profoundly receptive.  In my practice I regularly work with fretful and uncomfortable babies (showing Mother how) and with children and teenagers.

Question:  How long will it take me to remove a terrifying experience that has given me nightmares and panic attacks for years or even decades?

Answer:  Often one hour for a single trauma.  Sometimes two or three hours.

If years of severe trauma have accumulated and reinforced, it will take much longer.  In this case a person will practise Self-EMDR (completely unsupervised and independently) on a regular basis for as long as necessary. Self-EMDR-hope-despair

What is the success rate?  In my specialist clinical practice, it is 100 percent for months at a time in the case of a single trauma.  With Self-EMDR, by a person lacking any experience, it is probably 80 – 90 percent depending on motivation.

It is your life.  Self-EMDR is free.  It represents a window of opportunity which has only recently swung open onto the world.

Download Self-EMDR now and start your journey of dicovery and healing within minutes from now. Click the BUY NOW button below to order NOW!

Why Are So Many Horrible Things Happening In The World?

Several people have contacted me, pointing to “the horrible things” that have been sweeping the planet:  “Despite what you explained, I can see nothing logical or positive about 70,000 people dying in the Syrian conflict, the Sandy Hook Elementary School massacre in Newtown, the Boston marathon bombing, and many other cruel events carried out by individuals that seem to be getting more commonplace.  Why, why, why at a time when we were promised an era of change in the world?”


DES:  Look in the mirror.  You are making it happen – as we all are.  Many people in many countries acknowledge that an “energy” has come upon the planet and will increase as the years go by.  That force, as part of a delicate balance ordered up by Mother Nature or natural law (by whatever name), facilitates and enables every individual and group of individuals.  We hold POWER in our hands that was not there before.  We can CREATE what was impossible in the past.  We can STEER human destiny in a way that has always been beyond our reach.  Our planet is now OUR responsibility for the first time.  We have grown up!


So … what are we doing about it?  Because the physical plane has always been comprised of both negative and positive energy, and because free will always has the final say (individually and therefore collectively), the entire spectrum of our behaviour is being empowered by the changing energy.  The expression of positive, loving, giving, empathic behaviour is progressively being boosted.  The same principle feeds negative behaviour so that egotism, materialism, elitism, self indulgence, hatred, jealousy and discrimination increasingly bolster one ideology or another.  In some cases primitive appetites are being kindled and fuelled.